Quite An Act

You know the song "I Write The Songs" by Barry Manilow? He didn't write it.

No, that little ditty was penned by a gentleman from Peoria, Illinois named Benjamin Baldwin. You may know him by his stage name, Bruce Johnston, or you may know his work as a member of the band he joined in 1965 -- the Beach Boys.

Funny, huh?

I bring this up because I've discovered that one of my favorite Internet personalities, Paul "Fitzy" Fitzgerald of the irreverent Townie News, is, well, not the guy who writes the songs.

For those who have never read him or seen the YouTube clips, "Fitzy" is the ultimate Boston sports fan, a Bahstahn-accented pontificator who worships the Red Sox, the Patriots, and anyone else who plays in the Hub, but mostly the Red Sox. The commentaries are usually howlingly funny and never, ever safe for work -- his signature sign-off is "GFY," which will come to you in a minute.

The site has been a guilty pleasure of mine for a long time, and Fitzy's talents have been discovered by the likes of ESPN.com and some of the cable channels. And that's where the mystery started.

A few months ago, I was flipping past VH1 and caught one of those "I Love The..."-type shows, the ones where they interview several hundred marginally recognizable figures from the entertainment industry and edit their snarky comments into packages about pop culture from way back when. While I cannot remember the topic, I do remember seeing "Paul Fitzgerald" -- the graphic on the screen did not refer to him as "Fitzy" -- being interviewed. He was labelled as an "Actor." And his accent had mysteriously disappeared.

So I did some more homework and found his Internet Movie Database (IMDB) page. Lo and behold, he's an actor, alright, with a lengthy resume' that includes soap operas, prime-time dramas, some indie films, and stage work. But here's the part that kills me: he's not from Boston at all.

He's from New York. Born in NYC, raised in Virginia, went to college at Northwestern in Chicago. Nothing even close to Boston. Go watch a few YouTube clips and tell me this guy isn't the greatest actor of our generation.

Honestly, I really believed he was a Bostonian. That accent is pitch-perfect, and the attitude is totally New England. How did he get this gig, and why?

Try as I might, I cannot find a single article about Paul Fitzgerald, Actor, that mentions his work as Fitzy on Townie News. I know it's the same guy -- I've seen enough publicity photos in my life to recognize that it's the same guy. But nowhere -- NOWHERE -- can I find an admission that "Fitzy" is an acting gig.

And since we know that it is, who's paying him? Who's making the money off that Townie News site? How did they find him? I have to know these things.

FWIW, when I say I'm a native Floridian, I mean it. This ain't no act. But I'm fascinated by this Fitzgerald thing. Anybody have any clues?