Good TV

Anybody else catch the glaring gaffe towards the end of Sunday's Indy 500?

One of the two race analysts - either Scott Goodyear or Rusty Wallace, not sure which - was attempting to convey the pulse-pounding excitement of the final ten laps when he blurted, "this is the most exciting Daytona 500 - excuse me, Indianapolis 500 - that I've ever seen!"

Whoops. My bad. Hey, no worries. It's not like open-wheel racing suffers from an identity crisis in this country or anything.

In my previous life as host of "RPM2Night" on ESPN2, I boldly stepped into the internet fray with thoughts on the open-wheel split between the Indy Racing League and whatever the remnants of CART are calling themselves this week. Took a beating then, have no plans to repeat it now. You haven't lived until Jack Arute throws you under the bus in print. Happened to me. Courageous act on his part, too, seeing as how we worked about one hundred yards away from each other.

I will say this: the final two minutes of that race was spectacular television. Give credit to Wallace, a relative novice when it comes to TV (and Indy Car racing, for that matter), for telling it like it was when he admitted that he was pulling for Marco Andretti. I mean, honestly, who wasn't? No use pretending otherwise.

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Jeff Maggert? Is he still on tour? Saw him roll in about sixty feet of putts in three holes to put a stranglehold on the FedEx St. Jude Classic in Memphis. Another home run from a TV announcer, this time from my favorite golf guy, David Feherty, who noted after Maggert's eagle on 16: "For a while, it appeared that nobody wanted to win this tournament, but Jeff Maggert just changed all that." Or something to that effect.

It may not be "Yes, SIR!," or "Is it his time? Yes!," but it was still pretty good.

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Hey, Barry Bonds just hit number 715. Note the outpouring of emotion from his teammates, who can't decide between being afraid of him or hating his guts. Much like every baseball fan in America.

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The History Channel ran a marathon of "Band of Brothers" episodes this weekend, in conjunction with Memorial Day. Stop what you're doing, drive to the video store, and buy the DVD box set. Watch them in order. You'll thank me later.

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Jason Varitek hits a three-run shot to tie the game for the Red Sox against Toronto. Per our family custom over the last five years, I yell, "Jason Varitek! From?"

And my wife, in an exhausted tone, mumbles: "Lake Brantley."

You just have to know these things.

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Edmonton still has a hockey team? I've never set foot in that fine city, but here's my vibe on Edmonton: Working-class city. Down on its heels. Oil's dried up. Rust belt. Resents the hell out of its headline-grabbing Canadian neighbors, like Toronto, Vancouver, and Calgary - especially Calgary, that snooty provincial neighbor with all the cool bars and tourist trade. Takes great pride in the little things, like the fact that the ice surface at the Oilers' rink is considered to be the best in the NHL. Lives for hockey. Going to the Stanley Cup Finals.

I would donate bone marrow to be in Edmonton this week. One can only imagine the party. I'm always happy when an 8th-seed in anything reaches the mountaintop.

So yeah, you can guess who I'm rooting for.

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FSU spring football on "Under the Lights" on Sun Sports, followed by Florida spring football. In the pipeline: "Under the Lights" episodes on the Miami Hurricane Mystique, and George O'Leary (he of the ten million dollar contract) at UCF. Any questions as to what drives the bus around here?

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Miami-Detroit, Game Four. Dwyane Wade is one of the five best players in the NBA. Chauncey Billups is an average NBA player in a perfect situation. The fact that Billups drew serious consideration for MVP and Wade did not is one of the great mysteries of life.

Oh, and I forgot one very important entry in my previous list of Bizarro Sports World facts: a short, white Canadian is your reigning, two-time NBA Most Valuable Player.

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Golf Channel repeat of a Shell's Wonderful World of Golf match between Nick Price and Payne Stewart, played on a course in Aruba. Not much to say here, other than this: Stewart had the prettiest swing I ever saw.

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Coming this Thursday, Friday, and Saturday: "Sportsman's Adventures," starring Rick Murphy, airing on Sun Sports. This month's episode features Rick showing his TV co-host how to fish for sharks in Florida Bay. My arms ache at the mere mention. No animals were harmed in the taping of this program.

See you on TV.